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Many people leave jobs for their family’s sake

It seems that a lot of people are resigning from their jobs these days for the sake of their family. At least that’s what they say, including White House deputy chief of staff, Karl Rove, who resigned from his job this past week.

In so many words, it’s the same thing deputy attorney general Paul McNulty told his boss, attorney general Alberto Gonzales. According to a May news story on National Public Radio, McNulty told him his decision “was motivated by ‘the financial realities of college-age children.’ ”

When you ask the average worker why they want to leave or do leave their jobs, their reasons sound very different. They say there’s no way to advance at the company. Because of bureaucracy. Corrupt or inept managers. Bad co-workers. Bad or unfair treatment. No feedback or recognition. Inflexible work hours. Low salary. Bad environment or culture. No way to voice concerns. Unfair rules.

What they are saying is that they feel disappointed, frustrated, disillusioned, betrayed and angry. Leigh Branham, author of “The 7 Hidden Reasons Employees Leave,” noticed this when reading through exit survey responses of more than 3,000 workers. He says, “very few of the ‘reasons’ for turnover were based on reasoned thinking — they were mostly rooted in strong feelings.”

He says that for these folks, thoughts of leaving their jobs begin when one or more of four fundamental human needs are not being met:

• The need for trust. This is the expectation that the company and management will deliver on its promises, be honest and open, invest in you, treat you fairly and compensate you fairly and on time.

• The need to have hope. This is believing you can grow and develop through training and advance, which will lead to higher earnings.

• The need to feel a sense of worth. This is when you feel confident that if you do good work, work hard, are committed and make meaningful contributions, you’ll get recognized and rewarded. You’ll also be treated with respect and as a valued asset.

• The need to feel competent. This is the expectation that you’ll be in a job that makes good use of your talents and you’ll get the training needed to do the job well and regular feedback on how you’re doing.

Most of my clients who are thinking about leaving their jobs and who do, cite these exact reasons for their dissatisfaction. When you delve deeper, they share how their frustration over not having these things creates issues for them outside the workplace — that is, with their families.

When their company has not delivered on its promises, they bring home their unhappiness. When they lack hope that they will advance and make more money or don’t feel respected, their despair is the topic at the dinner table. When they are torn between spending time with family and work, the family feels the brunt of it.

These public figures might be putting a spin on the reason for leaving their jobs. But a lot of people really are bailing out for the sake of their family.

Are workers’ expectations unrealistic? Or does what they’re frustrated about tell the story of much of today’s workplace? Either way, it can’t be good for the companies they work for or a worker’s state of mind.

(Andrea Kay is the author of “Life’s a Bitch and Then You Change Careers: 9 Steps to Get Out of Your Funk and On To Your Future.” Send questions to her at andrea@andreakay.com.)